Manage Our Disappointments

How we manage our disappointments in life matters. The bumper sticker, “Life Stinks” is more than accurate in some seasons of life. The truth is, we’ve all experienced life’s disappointments. But did you know that the bigger obstacle to overcome may not the disappointment itself? That’s right. Many folks will endure the crisis, but it’s the days, weeks, months, or years after it that can make us or break us.

Acknowledge The Disappointment

Five years after my husband’s fatal car accident, I knew something wasn’t right. I had dealt with my grief and sorrow ad nauseam. I was pushing through and trying the best I could to get over it. But I had an underlying feeling of disappointment and depression. Life just wasn’t working for me anymore. I had to come to terms with the sorrow I had been ignoring. I acknowledged my disappointment; yes, even five years after my husband’s death, I was still grieving his loss. This is step one on how to manage our disappointments.

Manage Our Disappointments

Feel The Pain from the Disappointment

The greatest generation certainly did a lot of great things, however one little nugget that passed itself through my lineage was the belief system –  ignore it and it will go away. This small sentiment could not be larger in its destructive and unhelpful commentary, especially when dealing with sorrow and disappointment. “It” will not disappear. Disappointment is dealt with when it is given space to be acknowledged and validated. Then and only then will it be stripped of its power over us. I allowed myself time to process my pain, feeling it by pondering what had happened and what effects it had had on me and my children.  

Give the Disappointment to the Man of Sorrows: Jesus

I LOVE that the Savior of the World, Jesus, was acquainted with sorrow. Isaiah 53:3 says, He was, “A man of sorrows and acquainted with grief. We give our pain, suffering, sorrow and disappointment to One who knows of those feelings first hand and carries them for us. He’ll do the work of carrying it for us, but we must give it to Him and LEAVE it with Him.

Change the Way You Think and Act to Manage Disappointments

Okay, here’s a practical example to manage our disappointments: Let’s say you pay someone to haul your household garbage away, but yet they never get to do the job because you keep hauling it to the dump yourself!  That’s not letting them do the work, is it? Yet we say we give our burdens to Jesus by laying them at his feet, but then picking them up again! That’s a problem and exactly where I would get into trouble. I’d leave the burden with Him, but then I’d pick it up again with my stewing over the problem, or magnifying my disappointment and declaring my brokenness, instead of refusing to pick up the burden by keeping my mouth shut and taking my wandering, negative thoughts captive! (2 Corinthians 10:5)

Want to Hear More About How to Manage Our Disappointments?

Watch Julie’s You Tube Video.